Okay... this is NOT my life!

Have you ever had one of those days that you wish you could just do completely over? Yeah... that's the kind of day I've had. I slept in a little later than I should have, but I should have just stayed there all day, as it turned out.

The first thing I did today was catch my toes on the corner of the china cabinet, I then spent the next ten minutes cussing and hopping around on one foot. Twenty minutes later, I did the same damn thing again. I did invent some great new vulgar word combinations, though!

After recovering from that, I got ready to take a shower only to discover that the pilot light on the water heater had gone out. Let me just say, somewhere in this world there is a sadistic bastard who designs pilot light systems, laughing his ass off. I washed my hair in cold water in the sink.

Running about an hour late, I finally got everyone in the car and went to pick up my father for lunch. He was asleep when I got there, and he refused to put on regular pants to go out in. I was in no mood to argue with him so I took him to lunch in his flannel pajama bottoms and bed head. He decided he had to have McDonald's... so that's where we went. Yum. While standing in line I looked over at my daughter and noticed she was covered in dirt, the knees of her pants caked with mud. She'd been outside practicing sliding earlier and I was so rushed I didn't even notice the dust cloud that was following her. All that was missing from this scene was The Beverly Hillbillies theme song playing in the background. I pick up the tray of food and turn around and run straight into an ex of mine. I looked like I had been through the mill and felt like it too. He, of course, looked perfectly put together and better looking than he did years ago.

I felt like curling up in the fetal position and locking myself in the closet when I got home... but, I can laugh now... or maybe I've finally snapped. Sometimes it's hard to tell. :P